Evolution: The first human beings, who lived between 5 and 1.8 million years,
had very little use for marriage. Using the behavior of bonobos, a species of Chimpanzees in Congo belt, as the basis for how early humans
would have behaved, it is presumed that males and females, in their nomadic
lives, had sex with many partners. Special food sharing was principally in
exchange for sexual favours. Because females could collect food, (fruits, nuts
and insects,) while still carrying and protecting their babies, males were not
needed as protectors or providers. That meant that in this period neither
partner gained from being in a committed pair.
Much later, the women performed most of the farming and the more
menial domestic tasks while the men did the fighting and continued to hunt. But
as agriculture became more complex and brought larger rewards, the stronger sex
wrested more and more of it into his own hands. The concept of marriage was to
create a legal contract by which a man could acquire a female slave.
As the climate warmed and the forests receded, humans began to
move out into the savannah, (grassy
plain in tropical and subtropical region,) where their diet consisted of
gathered vegetation, and meat killed by hunters using tools. A more meat-based
diet meant that babies were born earlier requiring more care from their
mothers. In this period, (between 1.8 million and 23,000 years ago,) the
males and females whose offspring’s most likely to survive were those that
formed at the very first marriages.
These may not have been marriages in the way that we think of
marriages today, but couples in this period would probably have stayed together
for about three or four years before one, or the other, would wander off to
start another family. (Perhaps not coincidentally, this is exactly the length
of time at which divorce rates peak in modern day marriages.)
About 23,000 years ago, humans started to grow their own food,
revolutionizing human relations. The invention of the plough over 4,000 years
ago meant that the most productive household arrangements were ones in which
men and women divided their tasks. Men were stronger and less physically tied
to children and so they went out and worked on the land. Women stayed closer to
the home and cared for children and engaged in a myriad of other chores.
This is the era in which marriage became the union between two
people that was recognized by their community. Agriculture tied people to their
land, meaning that at the end of the four-year period neither men nor women had
any inclination to wander off to find a new family. And so they stayed together
and worked as a unit to feed and care for the children they produced.
The creation of marriage as a legal contract between men and women
came into being over time as communities settled on what was a “normal” way for
them to organize a family and then codified that normalcy into law.
For example, if it was the norm within the group that men and
women were responsible for feeding and caring for their own children. Then laws
were created that gave men some assurance that the children they were raising
were their own and women some assurance that their husband would not leave them
all destitute.
So, the concept of marriage was not to create a legal contract
that made it possible for men to acquire female slaves. But the origin of
marriage came from the biological desire of both men and women to see their
children survive.
Religious philosophy:
According to Hindu tradition, marriage is an instrument for the pursuance of
higher goals of life, rather than a means for personal sexual gratification.
Christianity went a step further and said, “Marriage is a voluntary union of
one man and one woman for life to the total exclusion of all others.” Hence
there is no provision for divorce in Christian Law and only judicial separation
can be obtained from a Family Court in India. Ester Boserup, a French lady,
author of Woman's Role in Economic Development 1970, proposed that the high incidence of polygamy in sub-Saharan
Africa is rooted in the sexual division of labour in hoe-farming and the large
economic contribution of women. Islam did not invent the system of polygamy. It
existed from the early dawn of human history. Islam put a limit to the number
of wives that a person can have — a maximum of four wives at a time. Islam put
stringent conditions on a person who wanted to marry a second wife; he must be
able to provide and maintain the family, and also deal with both on basis of
justice and fairness. Islam is a practical religion; its laws are in line with
human nature. It does not deny the natural forces in humans; rather it
confronts them and provides guidance to control them without disrupting the
peace in society.
Historically, premarital sex was considered a
moral issue which was taboo in many cultures and considered a sin by a number
of religions, but since about the 1960s, it has become more widely accepted,
especially in Western countries. The studies show that more than two-thirds of
young people have had sexual intercourse while still in their teens. Almost all Western governments have
forbidden polygamy; but adultery is most rampant in these very countries. In
spite of all attempts to promote monogamous relationships, many married men
have extra-marital affairs resulting in higher divorce rates, broken families
and children growing up without fathers. Lurvey, of the Family Law Section of
American Bar Association said, “We are going from monogamy to something called
serial monogamy and we have no rules and guidelines; we’re groping in the dark
for how to conduct our lives.”
Modern Trends: The clamour for
women's rights in a lot of Western societies and among the elite Indians is
gradually increasing. The woman is steadily getting empowered; she is going out
to work, clubs and hotels, she has her independent thought process, she has her
likes and dislikes, she has financial, emotional and sexual freedom. The financial independence to women is one of the main reasons that
contributed to the drastic change in their thinking process. This is a very healthy trend for our society,
but when two adults who feel equally free in this world attempt to live
together for five decades, disagreements are bound to happen. The reason behind
divorce rates is not an unhealthy trend, but a healthy trend in an egalitarian
society.
The institution of marriage will be heavily
crippled in the decades to come, as women and men approach equality. Emotional
and psychological strength is gradually decreasing in both genders because of a
renewed definition of personal freedom that is more about “absolute freedom”
where one doesn't feel the need of restrictions at all. Despite how one
utilizes their sexual freedom, the need of one permanent partner is an
emotional necessity, and after a particular age, one does feel that need in
life. And that genuine need of a spouse is what will drive marriages in the
future, unlike the need to fulfill a social obligation to be married after a
certain age, as it stands today. It is significant to note that marriage is no longer needed for children to survive, and
therefore, now the moot question is, do we still need marriage?
Conclusion: Everything, including faith and institution of marriage, which
had a beginning (birth) and growth has an ending too. The ending is certain but
we cannot predict the time. Communism, an offshoot of Christianity, has gone
astray. The vanishing of Berlin-Wall, the fall of the Soviet Union and the
reforms in China confirm the same. This is a natural rule of law.
Excerpts from
NEED OF THE HOUR
By
Joseph
J. Thayamkeril,
Lawyer,
Cochin
josephjthayamkeril@gmail.com
memoirs
josephjthayamkeril.blogspot.com
josephjthayamkeril.google.com
